I escaped the confines of my apartment, drove two hours to Lubbock, all to meet up with a group of writers. So here I am, sitting here in a coffee shop, playing on my laptop. Isn’t this exciting! I’m working on a novel, which I’ve been working on for years, and I’m still working on … Continue reading
Tag Archives: Coming Out
Authentic
My life has been a series of small steps that led me to this point. I started this blog back in 2013 – check my first post here – and it’s been one small step after another for the past four years. I never thought I would be where I am now, living out in … Continue reading
The unexpected truths of my coming out
I won’t lie to you and say that coming out has been easy. It’s been a hard endeavor, terrifying and seemingly impossible. Every moment left me feeling lonely and afraid. Every person I tell is a potential rejection, and rejection is something I’m not very good at dealing with. So far it’s been better than … Continue reading
Telling my parents
I came out to my parents a couple of weeks ago. Again, I came out to my parents. I will admit that it was a difficult experience to go through, something that made me really emotional, but overall, it was a positive experience. My secret is out. I made a video, so I won’t say … Continue reading
The Year of Stefani
Is it time for the 2017 retrospective yet? We still have a ways to go, but in the closing month of the year, I can’t help but look back a bit. I started the year afraid of going out anywhere, and I ended up going to my company Christmas party last week. I have come … Continue reading
The Party
My store held our annual Christmas party this past Sunday, and though I really didn’t feel up to it, I went. Sunday was my day off, and I really didn’t want to leave the apartment and drive downtown to the Amarillo Civic Center. But I was hungry, and they were feeding us. I had … Continue reading
It’s work becoming me
So far this has been an illuminating experience. I have spent the whole of my vacation thus far in Stefani mode, embracing my inner self. It’s kind of exhausting. I know you cis-women are rolling your eyes at me, and I can’t blame you if you are, but damn this is tiring. Getting up, shaving, … Continue reading
Strides
This duality in my life is really exhausting. Like flat out, I’m weary to the very core of my being. My friend V says I should just come out. It’s easy for her to say, being openly bisexual, not that coming out would have been easy for her. I’m still stuck on self-preservation mode, though … Continue reading
Updating my blog
I’m starting to make a few changes here on my blog. I bought my domain name for starters. Now it’s simply StefaniLara.com. I think it has a nice ring to it. I also updated my tagline to The Girl Within from A girl in Disguise. I never liked the latter much, and I think the new tagline … Continue reading
Accepting myself
I’m surprised at myself for having the courage(?) to actually post pictures of myself, namely my face, for all to see. I’ve hidden myself behind closed doors for years, even going so far as to deny myself the simple act of personal acceptance. I tried to pretend I wasn’t a crossdresser, even though I knew … Continue reading
Stefani Within 