There are days when I wonder who I am, and there are days, like today, when I wonder what am I? I look in the mirror and I’m torn between what I see and what the ideal man is, and the ideal I want for myself which in itself is a contradiction. I want to … Continue reading
Author Archives: Stefani Hinojosa
Shaving a yeti?
I now remember why I hate the process of becoming Stefani- the endless shaving. I haven’t even begun to shave yet. I started off running the hair trimmer through my legs. Yuck! The human body can be so disgusting. I feel like a yeti, and I haven’t even begun to trim my upper body. Luckily, … Continue reading
Going shopping
I’m back home and wishing I could go on another trip, this time as Stefani. I told my friend about it, and of course she’s all for it. First things first, I need to assemble a wardrobe. I haven’t got shopping in almost a decade. I’m feeling sad about it. I’ve done the all too … Continue reading
Ready for a change
I play a lot on Pinterest, looking at dresses, mostly dresses and shoes, and following other crossdressers. I’ve also started following cosplay and steampunk, as well as goth and emo boards, looking at the kind of outfits I would love to wear. I yearn for the freedom to express myself for the person who I … Continue reading
My dream…
It’s a silly dream, and one I’ve spoken before, but this picture brought it to the fore of my thoughts. It’s where I find myself, still in grade school, standing in front of the student body, in a line of other students in the gym, waiting to go out on a catwalk, like some sort … Continue reading
Dressing for work
I’ve been thinking about jobs lately, or to be more honest, a wholesale change in my career trajectory. I’ve spent most of my adult life working in retail, and it just doesn’t jive with me personality type. I’m not engaging or open, friendly or prone to smiling. I’m closed and reserved, not opening up until … Continue reading
Love or freedom?
I can’t really be definite, but I can remember being fascinated by the female form as a child of five or six. I remember being in school, and many of our teachers wore dresses in those days. Under those dresses they would of course be wearing pantyhose. I couldn’t help myself but stare at their … Continue reading
What would you do?
I was playing on Pinterest when I ran across the image on the right. If tomorrow you woke up as the opposite sex, what’t the first thing you would do? The grammatical errors notwithstanding, it got me thinking, what would I do? It’s a thought that haunted me growing up. I would fear that I would … Continue reading
I need a change
It’s time for a change. It’s been growing steadily in my mind for the past several months that the time has come to make a move, to embrace my inner woman, and I think the time is now. I’m ready to get out and play. Too bad it won’t be that simple. It never is. … Continue reading
The struggle between identity and faith
Here it is, another Friday night, and I’m lock up in my room, wishing I could go out and enjoy the nightlife. Sadly, for a girl like me, I don’t live in an area that’s conducive to being out. One, it’s the bible belt, and two, the area is so small that I would be … Continue reading
Stefani Within 